20 Apr Why Your Relationship with Yourself Matters Most
Your relationship with yourself influences every decision, every relationship and every moment of your life. You probably interact with dozens of people every day – family, friends, colleagues, even strangers. These relationships are both visible and fleeting. But one thing is certain: your relationship with yourself is always there. Wherever you are, whoever you’re with.
So why is your relationship with yourself so important and not a selfish one, and how can you make it a priority every day? Read on to find out.
Why You Need to Put Yourself First—Without Feeling Selfish
Prioritising yourself is like the rule on airplanes: in an emergency, put on your oxygen mask first. You can’t help others if you can’t breathe. This is the idea of healthy selfishness – putting your own well-being first, not because you’re selfish, but because it allows you to give from a place of strength and balance. That way, you can be fully present for the people and tasks in your life. Just remember this: When you start to focus on yourself, you’re not addressing the ego, you’re just practising awareness.
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Understanding What It Means to Truly Prioritise Yourself
What does a relationship with yourself really mean? It’s not just the occasional massage or feel-good TV show or other forms of self-care routine. It goes much deeper than that, reflecting how you talk to yourself, how you value your own feelings, choices and achievements, and how you treat your body and energy. This relationship shapes your goals, reactions, boundaries and even your capacity for joy.
When you prioritise your needs, protect your boundaries and recharge your energy, you become more present, more alive and more connected.
Friendship with oneself is all-important because without it one cannot be friends with anyone else in the world.
Why Prioritising Your Relationship with Yourself Changes Everything
If you want to strengthen your relationship with yourself, it’s helpful to think about it through four key lenses:
Intrapersonal – Your Inner World
This is about your thoughts, your emotions, the depth of your self-love and especially your self-talk. Is your inner voice kind or harsh? Does it encourage or criticise? If you’re always thinking negatively about yourself, it can make your anxiety and self-esteem problems worse. The aim is to replace these negative thoughts with positive ones. In sport, for example, positive self-talk helps athletes to get the body to act in a desired way, to focus, to motivate themselves and to improve their performance.
Here’s a reflective question for you: If my inner voice were different, how would I feel day by day?
Interpersonal – Your Relationships Mirror You
How much you prioritise yourself is reflected in your relationships: The way you interact with other people says a lot about who you are. Your boundaries, communication style and emotional availability often reflect how you relate to other people. For example: How easy is it for you to set boundaries? Do you need constant feedback to feel valued? Do you have what it takes to make a deep, authentic connection?
Here’s a reflective question for you: I was wondering if the way I treat other people is similar to how I treat myself.
Environmental – Your Living Space and Habits Matter
The way you organise your space, how you spend your time and how you take care of your body, mind and spirit all show how much you value yourself. The first step to making sure you don’t lose track of time and supporting your growth is to create a solid daily routine. There are also a few ways to bring positive energy into your home. These don’t just affect your outside world, but your inside world too. They can help you calm down, stay focused and boost your energy levels.
Here’s a reflective question for you: Are my habits really serving me, or am I stuck in a rut?
Energetic – The Flow of Vitality
Your life energy – your vitality – is the fuel for everything you do, feel and create. When you’re in tune with yourself, you start to notice how different people, places, habits or thoughts either drain you or energise you. Energy awareness and management is about learning to protect your energy, replenish your tank and channel it into the things that matter to you.
Here’s a reflective question for you: When does my energy flow naturally and when does it leak?
Everyday Practices to Put Yourself First and Protect Your Energy
You might feel like you don’t have time to focus on yourself right now, with everything that’s going on in your life. But you don’t need to make drastic changes. Little habits you choose can help you get in touch with your true self.
- Every morning, try writing three sentences about how you’re feeling. They don’t have to be pretty or positive – just honest.
- Try to take a walk every week without distractions, just paying attention to your thoughts.
- Listen to the tone of your inner voice. If it’s a little harsh, try rephrasing it as a good friend would.
- Allow yourself to make mistakes – you don’t have to be perfect to be good enough. Every mistake is a lesson to be learned.
- Why not try creating a little ritual just for you? A cup of ceremonial cocoa or matcha tea, the relaxing Savasana yoga pose or some form of calming meditation – the key is to take a moment for yourself.
- Adjust your posture – a straight spine allows your lungs to fill with air, keeping your oxygen supply optimal. A hunched posture interferes with breathing and reduces vital energy levels.
- Tune into your energy with the Egely Wheel Vitality Meter to get a better idea of your energy levels and how they change throughout the day.
- Find your own community – whether it’s a yoga group or the Egely Wheel community! You can meet people with similar values and be yourself without judgement.
Start measuring today
The Egely Wheel is trusted by thousands of people who practice yoga, telekinesis, meditation and healing. This device is the best solution for measuring your energy flow and efficiency of healing, and you get instant feedback.
Inner Balance is Built, Not Found
You can’t achieve true stability by trying to control everything. True stability comes from focusing on yourself with presence, acceptance and curiosity – even when things feel chaotic. It’s important to remember that your relationship with yourself is the foundation for all other areas of your life. So, you need to make sure you’re taking care of yourself mentally, emotionally, physically and energetically. When the world always seems to be pulling you in all directions, learning to put yourself first isn’t selfish – it’s essential, a kind of safe place, a quiet source of strength. And that’s something no one can ever take away from you.
4 Sources +
Egely Wheel has strict sourcing guidelines and relies on peer-reviewed studies, academic research institutions, and medical associations. We avoid using tertiary references.
- How to prioritize yourself – https://www.tonyrobbins.com/
- APA Dictionary of Psychology – https://dictionary.apa.org/
- Healthy Selfishness and Pathological Altruism: Measuring Two Paradoxical Forms of Selfishness – https://www.frontiersin.org/
- 120 Self-Love Quotes for a Boost When You’re Feeling Down – https://www.prevention.com/
